I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize
