Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
