She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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