yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Let's get the cat blown out
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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