You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
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New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
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You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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