Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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