im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
