Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
