i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
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I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
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I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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