no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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