I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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