The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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