so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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