WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.