Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Randomize
