With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
