Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Randomize
