I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
