you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
third nipple confirmed
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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