Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
