Are we in a gay sports bar?
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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