Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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