K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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