erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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