Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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