North Korea, Best Korea!
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!