My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
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