I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize