Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
