brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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