Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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