I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
