I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
