Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
