Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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