Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Randomize
