we have pet lesbian snakes
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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