I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
