I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
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He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
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We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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