Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Randomize
