operation harelip BJ is a go
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
