i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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