Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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