hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize