no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?