I hate your face
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?