1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
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