I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize