Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
