jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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