He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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